Waking Up In Spira
by MarleneShadowheart
Summary: *Waking Up In Vegas parody.* When Tidus is taken in by the Al Bhed at the beginning of the game, he decides to tell them his story-in song, of course! Warning: Contains a lot of hip-swaying, and other things Tidus definately should not be doing.


**A/N: Yay! My first songfic! Just passing the time while I procrastinate on the other Final Fantasy X story I've been planning forever.**

**Disclaimers: I do not own Final Fantasy X, or Waking Up In Vegas by Katie Perry.**

* * *

Tidus woke up on a boat a few minutes later with a pounding headache and absolutely no idea what was going on. He sat up, but was immediately shoved down by two men in diving suits carrying guns.

"Ced, lybdeja! (Sit, captive!)" one of them shouted, jabbing Tidus' shoulder with the barrel of his gun.

"Hu sejehk, rayn? (No moving, hear?)" the other one grunted hostilely.

A door behind them suddenly opened, and Rikku and Brother stepped out. "Caynlr res! (Search him!)" said Brother. Rikku stepped forward and searched his pockets.

Tidus rolled his eyes. There was no way to talk to these people, unless…Tidus smiled, an idea sprouting in his head.

Out of nowhere, the ringing sounds of slot machines and electric guitar pulsed through the air, driving the Al Bhed crazy. Tidus clapped his hands, and a sparkling microphone, similar to Yuna's from the sequel, dropped into his hand.

As the searchlights on the boat seemed to draw towards him, he swayed his hips, took a deep breath, and began to sing:

* * *

"_You gotta help me out_

_It's all a blur last night_

_Get us an airship_

'_Cause you speak Al Bhed and I don't_

* * *

_I lost my home city_

_And then you kidnapped me_

_Spare me your creepy angry looks_

_Now don't maim me_

* * *

_I wanna find Sin_

_And get the hell outta town_

_Don't be so cranky_

_Perhaps you could release me?_

* * *

_Shut up and put your guns back behind ya_

_This what I get for waking up in Spira?_

_Let up and take me back 100 years now_

_This what I get for waking up in Spira?_

* * *

The Al Bhed suddenly lost their steel glares and put down their guns, gaping in utter confusion. Rikku, the only one who understood English, groaned in agony as he botched up one of her favorite songs on the radio.

* * *

_Why was the town consumed?_

_Did I inhale Sin's fumes?_

_Strangled by Auron_

_Why're you wearing diving suits?_

* * *

_Don't call me crazy_

'_Cause I swear Zanarkand's real_

_Don't be so cranky_

_Perhaps you could release me?_

* * *

_Shut up and put your guns back behind ya_

_This what I get for waking up in Spira?_

_Let up and take me back 100 years now_

_This what I get for waking up in Spira?_

* * *

_How'd I get into this?_

_Time travel overload, situation lost control_

_Send out an S.O.S._

* * *

The makeshift spotlights flashed on and off while Tidus danced around, shaking his butt and swinging the microphone.

Rikku screamed, "The horror! The pop culture horror!" She ripped her goggles back on and jumped overboard into the sea, hoping to find a small island nearby to heal her mind.

The rest of the crew stood silent and quiet, their primal defensive instincts completely leaving them. They had never encountered such a disturbing performance in their lives.

* * *

_Ha, I wanna find Sin_

'_Cause he tore up the town_

_No, don't be so cranky_

_Perhaps you could release me?_

* * *

_Perhaps you could release me?_

_Perhaps you could release me?_

_Release me, release me? Oh, yeah!_

* * *

One of the Al Bhed ran back to the crowd holding an Al Bhed-English Dictionary. "E vuiht ed! (I found it!)" he shouted.

* * *

_Shut up and put your guns back behind ya_

_This what I get for waking up in Spira?_

_Let up and take me back 100 years now_

_This what I get for waking up in Spira?_

* * *

_This what I get, baby?_

_Take me back now_

_Take, take, take me back now_

_I wanna find Sin, baby_

_I wanna find Sin, baby!_

* * *

The music slowly faded out. Tidus, out of breath, smiled and nodded his head. "You understand?" he said, hoping they did.

The crew looked up some of his lyrics in the Al Bhed-English Dictionary and gagged. The improvised lyrics along with the gawd-awful singing and poor choreography were enough to make them shoot him.

But instead they made the unanimous vote to grant Tidus his wish and toss him overboard towards the beast below.

* * *

**Wow, I hoped you all aren't too scarred for life...:S How Tidus could think that singing would make them understand is completely unknown to me...**

**Please review! I always love to know how I'm doing! I'm a fragile soul so please don't flame! PEACE OUT!**


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